Whither The English Weather

When two Africans meet the talk invariably gets to African politics; when two strangers meet in England the conversation-starter is always the weather. With the Olympics only a few hours away I have to admit that -- like most folks -- I'm intensely worried about the English weather. Will  it rain incessantly throughout the duration of the Olympics? Will the beach-volleyball players compete in driving rain? After all, last month was England's wettest June on record. It rained non-stop throughout the whole month, disrupting the tennis at Wimbledon and the F1 racing at Silverstone.

You see no-one has ever made two-and-two of the English weather; it's neither here nor there. One minute it's sunny, the next it's grey and overcast. As for the English weather forecasters: forget about them, for they're about as useful as the economic statistics from Papua New Guinea!

I even have a pet-theory that the Pilgrim Fathers who left England for the New World in 1620 did so not for religious freedom, but rather to escape from the dreary English weather. They just couldn't take it anymore! Rather than be driven insane by the cold, grey, dreary English weather, they decided to save themselves by seeking out more pleasant surroundings to live in. And they found it, here in the good 'ol U.S of A.

Nigeria, Where Art Thou?

As I watched the tragic destruction of centuries-old African tombs in Mali by religious fanatics from the Maghreb, I could not but think of  Nigeria. Yes, you heard me right, Nigeria. If Nigeria was truly the "Giant of Africa" with an economy of, say, $600Bilion to match its population of 162 million, no rag-tag army of religious zealots from Algeria, Mauritania & Pakistan would have dared smash there way into an African country and abused its population and heritage.

It's because Nigeria lays comatose under the directionless leadership of (the fantastically misnamed) President Goodluck Jonathan, that the ancient heritage of Mali and Black Africa is being abused by barbaric nomads from afar. Let us not forget that Black Africa too has produced its fair share of barbarians. But these barbarians were swiftly dealt with by the Nigerian authorities. In Sierra Leone, the villainous R.U.F rebel movement was wont to chop the hands off innocent civilians until the Nigerian military intervened (in the 90s) to make the peace. The Nigerian military intervened too in Liberia (90s) after the civil war there got out of hand.

Of-course Nigerian intellectuals would say (in their defence) that they have too many problems at home to worry about the problems in Mali. But, it must be stated that the domestic problems in Nigeria are all the symptoms of the dysfunction of the Nigerian political elite. Had Nigeria developed economically and socially as it should have, we never would have heard of the Boko Haram in Northern Nigeria. 

In the same vein, as I've stated above, a prosperous Nigeria would have never tolerated the rape of Black-Africa's heritage by nomadic barbarians from afar. It's time for the Nigerian "ship" to be put back on the proper course of economic and social development. Where goes Nigeria so goes the rest of Black Africa.

Zimbabwe: Travel Sanctions Must Stay

I have been reading that the E.U is considering dropping all sanctions against the Govt of President Mugabe and I welcome this positive development. But having said that, I wish to state categorically that only trade sanctions should be removed; the travel sanctions against leading members of Robert Mugabe's Govt must remain firmly in place. Here's the reason why.

After Kenyans, the most Anglophile folks on the planet just might be my fellow Zimbabweans. Anglophilia runs amok in my beloved Zimbabwe, to almost comical proportions. Were all sanctions to be lifted, all functions of the State would come to a screeching halt, as all Govt functionaries would hop on the first plane out to London.

There literally would be no Govt Ministers, Permanent Secretaries & senior bureaucrats left in Harare to carry out the affairs of the National Govt. Bond Street & Oxford Street in London would be teeming with Zimbabwean bureaucrats, elbowing Arab-Shieks and Russian Oligarchs out of the way. The food-court at Harrods would be emptied out as our Zimbabwean bureaucrats gorged themselves silly with exotic-food.

As I've just colourfully explained above, Zimbabweans are besotted with all things British and so, for the benefit of our National Exchequer and our essential governing functions, it's important that the Travel Sanctions Stay Firmly In Place.